When my husband told me that he had been flirting with a coworker and had even taken her out for coffee, I wasn’t sure what to think at first. I was angry, sad, heartbroken, jealous, and so many other emotions that it is hard to narrow it down to which one was the strongest. I asked him why he had done this, and he had no answers. He did want us to salvage our marriage though, which is why he told me. He also suggested that we look into Charlotte marriage counseling, and I had to agree that this was the only thing we could do if we were going to get back on track.
I admit that when we first started going to the counselor, I had a huge chip on my shoulder about what had happened. Even though my husband did not betray our vows in a physical way, I still felt betrayed because he had an emotional investment to this woman. The first thing I had to do was get rid of my anger, and that was not an easy thing to do. Going to the marriage counselor really opened my eyes up to a lot of things though.
I was blaming my husband for everything that happened, and he was willing to take that blame. However, the therapist we saw was not so willing. She opened up my eyes to our relationship, and my role in why my husband had a straying eye, if nothing else. I am so glad she did that though, because it really helped me forgive him, knowing that I carried a part of the blame too. We got so wrapped up in life that I had started to ignore him in certain ways, and he was just reaching out for any kind of emotional attachment. I am so thankful that he stopped when he did though, because we were able to salvage our marriage, and I do not take it for granted any more!